TFFF Editorials: Its Not Easy Being In Between

Every so often Too Fat for Fashion will feature plus fashion centric editorials from our talented contributors. This week Sonya K takes on the unique perils of inbetweenie shopping.


Its Not Easy Being In Between
By Sonya K

“I tried on a pair of shorts like yours the other day”

“Oh yay! Bermudas! Did you get them?”

“Oh, god no. I would have had to go up to a size 12, and I just couldn’t do that.”

“Err … right then.”

This conversation took place between me and my friend a little while ago, back when Bermuda shorts were making a comeback and every woman and their dog had purchased a pair. The friend in question is normally an Australian size 8-10. I am an Australian 14-16. I am mostly happy at the size I am, but that conversation made me feel like a massive heffalump. It shouldn’t have, she didn’t mean any harm to me with that statement. I, of course intellectually knew that, but getting that message through to my emotions and feelings was another thing all together.

It got me thinking though. How is it that a skinny girl, is made to feel ‘fat’, simply because of a number on the label? Why is that that I, not by any means skinny, but not quite fat have so much trouble fitting into clothes? Shopping should be an enjoyable experience, full of spent money and perhaps the occasional bout of skipping (depending on the caffeine consumed). Instead, it usually consists of tears, frustration, and rage akin to the Incredible She-Hulk. Whilst green is my colour, I want to be able to change this problem.

I am definitely not belittling the truly plus sized women out there. I’ve watched what my mother and other friends have had to go through, and I can understand how extremely frustrating it can be - trying to shop for cute/sexy/nice clothes, and despairing when the clothes are mumu-esque, bedazzled, expensive, or all three. But it can be equally as frustrating shopping for clothes when you’re my size. An ‘inbetweenie’ is what some people call it. This basically means that I am too small for the plus sized stores and too big for the ‘trendy’ stores. It’s not even that I want to particularly dress in these ‘trendy’ clothes, but it would be nice to enter a cheap little shop, and be able to buy a cute top for a party, without spending an exorbitant amount of money.

Don’t even get me started on the sizing difference between stores. I can be a 12 at one, and barely fitting into an 18 in another. The other issue that is annoying is the fact that stores don’t cater to body shape. They assume that the bigger you are, the bigger your boobs butt and hips are, when a fair amount of the time, this isn’t the case. Stores should start designing to body shapes, not sizes! The worst offenders of the sizing/shape difference for me are jeans and pants. No wonder I hate shopping for them, and when I find a pair I like, that actually look good, I always buy a couple. But then those couple inevitably stretch out, loose shape, and make me look like I have major saggy bum issues.

So, what to do? How do we get around this often frustrating, tear inducing experience? Well, in a number of ways. The first of which is to shop. Oh hey, one of my favourite things to do in the world, next to sleeping and drowning myself in perfume.

Secondly, set aside an entire day to actually get a thorough look in every store. And I mean every store. Scour that baby like it’s going out of style, and then do it once more for good measure.

Thirdly, get outside your shopping comfort zone. We all end up getting stuck in a rut, shopping where we know we will find something. But, it can get boring. Therefore, that store that you would never dare/deign to enter might end up containing a virtual treasure trove of undiscovered lovelies.

Fourthly, bring along an honest friend. Whilst I prefer shopping by myself, sometimes a friend is needed for a second opinion, other than the sales assistant who may just want to be selling you those clothes.

Lastly, the only way to effect change is to make it happen. If you’re not happy with the way clothes are cut, or sizing in store, try to do something about it. Start writing to the companies, stating your problem effectively and calmly. I plan to follow my own advice by starting to do just this.

This is a small list of things that could be done in order to enrich your shopping experience. There are many, many more ways that this can happen. I would really like to hear about some other tips and advice that you guys have to make shopping become the money wasting, caffeine-induced skipping experience that should be enjoyed by all.