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Too Fat For Fashion: Those Lazy Hazy Crazy Days
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Monday, August 6, 2007

Those Lazy Hazy Crazy Days

Let’s talk lounge. And I don’t mean as in lizard (although I can often be found sipping martinis in the company of finger-clickin' gentlemen, listening to "The Girl From Ipanema"). I mean as in the laziest past-time of them all, lounging.

Is sitting on your backside really a past-time? Or is just being indolent? All I know is, the various lounging combinations – a sofa and a TV remote, a bed and a book, a heap of cushions and a stereo, me a blanket and my honey in the park, heck, even a pile of dirty laundry and a porno mag – make me joyously happy.

The first thing to remember is, lounging is not sleeping. If you wake up and then stay in bed under the covers all day, you’re probably depressed and need Prozac, not a fashion blog. Also, if you wear your pyjamas all day and all night, they will eventually develop a nasty crust and you’ll smell. (Trust me on this.) Lounging doesn’t smell. Except maybe of rainbows and kittens and a freshly poured bowl of cereal.

Lounging is that glorious state-of-mind, state-of-being, when, after having got up and showered and breakfasted and all the rest of it, you decide to be slothful. Perhaps you’ll go back to bed – above your duvet but underneath a spare blanket – or maybe you’ll curl up on the sofa, or if it’s sunny even in a deckchair in the garden. Wherever you choose to rest your weary head and paint castles in the sky, you won’t want to be wearing anything uncomfortable.

Lounging clothes walk a fine line between clothes and pyjamas. On the one hand, you want to be comfortable. On the other, should you have to answer the door or maybe walk to the corner shop for extra supplies of M&Ms or whatever, you want to be dressed in something vaguely resembling chic. It’s a perilous line you walk, when you lounge. Although a few pairs of cute cotton pyjama bottoms, the sort with an elasticated waist that look totally cute when paired with a plain coloured tank, might find their way into your lounging wardrobe.

The thing that makes the difference is underwear. If you're wearing clean knickers and a decent bra, you can totally go to the shops in pyjama bottoms, a tank, a cardigan, and flip-flops. Really. Something about being gussied and trussed up underneath your jammies makes them feel like clothes, a fact I took full advantage of for several years in college.

What you want then are jersey layers and wide-legged trousers, fitted hoodies with chic details, camisole vest tops, and sweat pants. So long as everything is clean, ironed, and fits well, it won't look slobby. It doesn't have to be kaftan loose to be comfortable -- a good pair of sweatpants with a very wide waistband will look chic without cutting into you.

It is crazy to spend oodles of money on clothes that will never see the light of day (except for those emergency snack shop visits). Marks and Spencer, John Lewis, Evans, Primark, and all the high-street suspects all do plus sizes (usually up to 28, though Evans run to a 32) with a good selection of jogging bottoms, jersey tops, cardigans and hoodies, in neutral colours, for all your lounging needs.

For some reason there's some sort of ironic thing going on, in that the most comfortable AND stylish picks for lounging around and being idle, are in the sports and fitness wear section. Check out sports shops like Sweaty Betty for the most flattering and comfortable pants -- Stella McCartney for Adidas last season did THE most insanely comfortable and sexy jogging bottoms. You couldn't actually jog in them, but they're nice to wear. Although only up to a Large/UK 14, they're cut very loose and more like a UK 18.

I don't know how I'm supposed to be motivated to go running when the clothes are all soft and yummy and oh look a sofa aaaaaaaaaaand naptime....zzzzzz


Top, from a selection at Toast; Pashmina, £75 at John Lewis; Ballet slippers, £65 from French Sole; Pyjama bottoms, $37.90 at Nordstrom; Jogging bottoms, £9.50 from Marks and Spencer; Chocolate wrap cardigan, £25 at Evans; Draped wrap cover-up, £65 at Boden.

Please tell me you guys have an entire cupboard dedicated to lovely lounging clothes too, so that I don't feel like the only lazybones sittin' in the sun this summer.

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